good fences make good neighbors

June 26, 2018 | Comments Off

So when we moved here, there was an empty lot behind our house. The elderly couple who lived here before us told us that the house had burned down and that the owner moved on afterwards instead of rebuilding (I think that’s the story, iirc). So someone bought the land, and the rebuilding on the property started late last fall – and it’s still going on! At times it can be so freaking loud, and I just can’t wait for it to be over. It’s a nice sized lot, and we estimate the home built is around $600,000. I have been wanting to take a peek at the inside, but the wrought iron gates around it are padlocked when the workers aren’t there. There is a small section where you can enter the property, but it’s a big climb and then a steep hill after you make the initial climb up. So, yes, we ignored the “no trespassing” signs to look around. Needless to say, I have no upper body strength or lower body strength, so climbing up sucked some serious balls. Also, I had on the wrong kind of shoes – slip on sneakers that slipped right off and fell back to the road. I also fell at one point which is what happens when you don’t have any coordination. I was obviously totally winded after hiking this hill, and it was all for nothing. All the doors and windows had something on them (paper?) that blocked any kind of visibility. In other words, I couldn’t see shit. And while we were looking around, there was this other couple walking along the road who stopped to watch us. We hightailed it out of there in case the police were called. I was in a nightgown without underwear, and I didn’t think going to jail like that would be ideal. Anyway, there’s still a lot left for the workers to do, including paving and fixing our fence. I’m sure the fence won’t be fixed until after they move in and we have to mention that their contractors fucked it up. I’m sure that’ll go over well. “Hi. Nice to meet you. Welcome to the neighborhood. Now fix this fence.” In general, though, I hope they are quiet, nice, and kind to all the animals around (neighborhood cats, stray cats, deer, raccoons, etc…). In fact, it’d be great if they put in a pool and I could pretend to like them and be social enough to be able to use it. My pain management doctor is always on my ass to use a pool. I’d like for us to put in a pool, but our yard would need major leveling work done first in order for that to be possible. Mark isn’t totally on board with that, though. I loved pools when I was little, but I’m talking about pools in someone’s yard. I can’t get behind going to a facility or a YMCA where tons of people share the same one. And the overall smell of the pools and changing rooms in those places make me want to hurl. Besides, when I did do aquatic therapy, i never found relief like I was supposed to. Speaking of relief, I did get my medical marijuana card, so I’m able to go to a dispensary sometime soon (you get the card but can’t use it for like two weeks or some such). The timing is pretty decent as I’ve started doing my physical therapy exercises again here at home. This kicks up my pain, so having extra help after doing them would be rad – if my body responds to the marijuana. I’ve taken a loooooot of different medications that haven’t affected me at all, but there are many variations of this to try. So fingers crossed!

I think I mentioned that the house across the street is vacant because the owner is in the cia and just needs a physical address. We’ve also peeked inside this house, and it’s wildly outdated, obviously. But his brother and his wife stop by the property periodically to do some yard work. They are ancient and slow-moving, so I don’t know why they don’t hire someone to do that shit for them, especially since he’s a surgeon. Maybe they send all their money back to family in their country of origin, like they do on 90 day fiancé? Anyway, they stopped by here last year to introduce themselves, and they didn’t know I knew about the cia thing or that I had previously snooped because they claimed to live there. Haha what? I had to invite him inside as he kept talking to me, and I couldn’t have my door open because of the cats, obviously. When I told him I had cats, he proceeded to tell me that I had to get rid of them and to do that as a favor to my neighbor (him). See, he met this model who came into his emergency room and complained of stomach issues. I’m not sure I’m remembering this story correctly, but you’ll get the gist. I guess they didn’t find anything wrong or she got better for a bit of time or something. Anyway, he and his wife had dinner at her apartment, and there were cats everywhere. A few months later she showed back up at the hospital with stomach pain again. It turns out she has lymphoma, and this doctor is convinced that she caught it from her cats. What the ever living fuck? What bullshit! I wonder how many people he has convinced to give up their cats based on that nonsense. I told my vet, and she says she hears shit like this all the time. For instance, someone sees a dermatologist for a rash, and the dermatologist says it could be from the cat and that she should get rid of the cat to see if the rash improves. But, like, she’s had the cat for eight years without any prior issue. WTF. Ugh.

So my hair has been thinning over the past few years, to my great dismay. I’m sure it’s due to my poor nutrition, but I’ve been taking keratin in an attempt to thwart the madness. I recently came across a recipe that’s supposed to help (and even reverse greying!), and it consists of honey, garlic, lemons, and flaxseed oil. Mark made it for me, and it’s godawful. I was hoping the honey would mask the garlic – but it does not at all; it’s like eating a spoonful of straight garlic. I gagged, and that was the end of that for me. No way anybody can have a tablespoon of that three times a day. No fucking way, dude. Actually, Mark and I got into a huge argument over this goddamned recipe. See, I showed him a recipe and then told him that one of the lemons had to have the rind on it. I saw the rind recommendation on a couple of other sites that contained the recipe, but it wasn’t on the one I sent him. He starts off by saying that there’s no way that could be right because nobody eats the rind. I said fine and let it go. I mean, I wasn’t in the mood to argue about it in that moment. Then later he comes back and said he read a different recipe that said to include it, so now he would. Now why can’t he understand how insulting that is to me? I told him to use the rind and that I had read it on a separate recipe – but that wasn’t good enough for him?! So basically it wasn’t on the original recipe, and he didn’t believe me. He had to see it written out on a different one with his own goddamned eyes. He does that kind of shit all the time – he doesn’t take what I say at face value and has to read it for himself. It’s beyond infuriating. And I brought this all up to him, and he had the nerve to get mad at me! I still don’t even know why he got all bent out of shape with me over it when he was in the wrong. Again, ugh.

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